


love like this

by silvermalec



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-17
Updated: 2017-09-17
Packaged: 2018-12-30 18:47:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12114939
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silvermalec/pseuds/silvermalec
Summary: a short post 2x18 oneshot, where after magnus having 'broken up' with alec, alec goes on latenight trainride and ends up pouring his heart out to a stranger.basically what i wrote after 2x18 came out to reassure myself and get over the pain of what that last scene was :,)





	love like this

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this after I listened to love like this by kodaline (where the titel's from!) and for some extra added sadness I suggest you put that on whilst reading this. overall it's a really beautiful song as well, so I suggest you just listen to it anyways lmao

Alec looked outside of the window absently, watching the world outside rush past him. Droplets of rain splattered across the train windows, turning his view muddy and getting him to focus on the face in his reflection staring back.

Looking at himself for the first time in two days, he realised his eyes looked unhealthily sunken in, dark bags decorating them and the usual lively splashes of green and yellow seeming dull. His skin looked ashy, his lips were cracked and chapped and his tangled hair sat messily on top of his head. After his conversation with Magnus he hadn't cared about anything at all, the way that he looked especially being the least of his worries.

Thinking back to that moment, he remembered how he'd stood in the hallway for a good ten minutes, hands still in the same position as when Magnus had let them go, until Izzy had come to check up on him. She'd found him stunned, unable to get a word over his tongue. Never had he felt something like that, like everything good in his life had been torn from his hands.

Because that was essentially what it had been like; though he remembered trying his hardest to get Magnus to stay, the images of him walking away stayed burned fresh in Alec's mind at the same time, a memory he felt he would never be able to forget.

He shook his head, attempting to shake the memory. He'd stepped on this train to forget in the first place; to distract himself from everything going on back home. Fishing his phone from his pocket, he took the pair of headphones Isabelle had gifted him a while ago to put on a playlist she'd recommended, because maybe this could finally get his mind off things. It'd been two days of pure agony, of no sleep, no food and no Magnus, so he felt he needed a bit of a distraction.

A very soft sounding set of piano chords rang through his ears as Alec sat back and watched the world slowly passing by. It was a pretty song, the instruments seemed to be played very cautiously, careful as to make them sound as gentle as they could be. He understood why Isabelle liked this song; it made him feel more at ease and a lot less tense, until he realised how much of every single lyric reminded him of Magnus.

A love like this won't last forever ...

The first line of the chorus hit closer to home than he'd expected it to. He couldn't contain the tears that threatened to fall, but he let himself; in an empty train carriage het let himself finally get it out.

He'd kept everything in these past few day. He hadn't been able to express anything and as much as he wanted to ask someone for help, he couldn't. Talking about it meant reliving it and at that moment in time Alec wasn't at all ready to go through that heartbreak again. Not again.

'Alexander?' Alec bolted up and met a worried pair of dark brown eyes, the colour being familiar and welcoming, though they didn't belong to the person he'd hoped they would.

'Do I know you?' he asked the woman that had just sat down in front of him, furiously whiping at his damp cheeks to rid the tears. She shook her head slightly as she offered him an apologetic look.

'Alexander.. it's on the duffle bag you're holding. Is it Alexander?' He bit back the tears that threatened to fall again. Only one person ever called him that.

'Alec,' he nodded at her, recieving a comforting smile in return, 'Alec Lightwood.'

'Are you alright?' He'd shaken his head at her before he'd even realised. He was far from okay, something that was clearly present in his face, even though most of the time Alec was as stoic and closed off as someone could be.

'It's complicated,' he decided, though he realised how much of an understatement that was. They were at the brink of a war, one of which he had no idea who'd end up siding with who; it was something this woman would never be able to understand.

'Hey,' she said softly, taking one of Alec's hands in hers, 'I know we've never met before and you don't have to explain anything to me, but maybe that's just what you need right now.' He couldn't help but smile at her, the feeling of someone's hand enclosing his offering him a sense of comfort.

'Go ahead,' she assured him, recognising the hesitation written on his face. Alec's lips parted in confusion slightly, though before he knew it he was pouring his heart out to a woman he'd never met before.

And although he had to leave certain parts out that would get her to think he was insane, it was good; having a comforting hand to hold onto as he spilled everything he'd been through, everything he'd said the past few days. His eyes were rimmed with tears and his cheeks were damp the entire time, but she hadn't said anything, she'd just listened to him.

As he spoke, Alec wondered whether maybe this time around him and Magnus wouldn't find their way back to each other, whether the current situation had taken everything out of them, beyond repair. He spoke about that too, listed every thought that came up in his head and something in that woman's eyes reduced the feeling of uncertainty in his chest.

'From what I hear, he loves you, to such an extent it's ought to be hurting him as much as this is hurting you,' she stated, confusing Alec as to why she'd say that, before she continued, 'It seems so special, your relationship, and I haven't even gotten to hear the finer things of it. What you said you've been through together, the support you've shown each other..' She grasped Alec's hand tighter and smiled when she saw his face, the look of refound hope written in his eyes.

'That isn't something either of you is going to give up on.'


End file.
